So today i was at a great event….and some people i’ve worked with on my Qadishti path were there. i got to talk to them about the next step on my path.
Two of the people i talked to are involved with POTQ1 and i was talking to them about bringing it back to Columbus. Maybe i didn’t ask the question right, because i don’t think they really understood what i was asking….but the conversation is started. i’ll detail it out in text or emails later.
Another person i confided in about my interest in moving forward said he was surprised that i waited this long. i told him that i had always wanted to do this with my partner, but he’s on another path. But, i think i’d be good at this and wanted to dive in and really embrace this path again. That i thought i’d be good at it …that i wanted to embrace it with more passion and even get into the deep, dark parts of the path….and he said with no hesitation that he absolutely agreed. Wow. That really boosted my energy towards this…. To have an outside person, someone that i really consider a friend, think that i’d be really good at this. i’m pretty sure i used to be….and over the years i still teach energy and tantra and such….but to really dive into it. His eyes even lit up at the idea.
And the research i was doing over the last couple of days….it fired up my interested again as well. i got that excited feeling of learning something new. i love that feeling. That’s what’s been missing.
More than a few years ago, i had this vision (i don’t even remember the details) that i should be working with a Goddess with Wings. i tried Isis and a few others and they just didn’t feel right. i also knew that it was supposed to be a Goddess for Sacred Sexuality. For weeks i looked at google images and finally found one that worked for me. It was Freya.
i tried Freya on. i liked it. i did an ecstatic dance and invoked Frey to ask her why she came to me if i was looking for a Goddess of Sacred Sexuality. She laughed and said, how do you think i got my amber necklace from the dwarves? i slept with them. i am absolutely a Goddess of Sex. Many people focus on the Goddess of War, Valkirie aspect, but there is so much more.
So, i worked with Freya for a very long time. i still work with her some days, but it’s very rare now.
Today, i was doing some research on Qadishtu/Qadishti/Sacred Secuality for a new facebook group i started….and came across this ….
And her animals are lions.
i’ve also worked with Sekhmet because of her lion aspects.
So…what if i was supposed to have worked with Ishtar? i know a few that do work with her and her other name, Inanna. Some have even named themselves after her.
Before, i tried to make myself work with her (before i even knew she had wings). It didn’t work. I’m not sure i even recognized she had wings. Freya did and Freya spoke to me.
Now, i’m seeing the wings of Ishtar/Inanna and it feels like i’m supposed to work with her.
We’ll see how it goes.
This poem to her that I found (in another language and then translated) really spoke to me when i found it today…
Prayer by Ishara Labyris, Ps. Dea
Who pierces the sky with its soft light
Flame of Life
Mixing with the rain
To create the Rainbow Necklace
And to walk between the worlds
Ishtar of the Sea
To the thousand river daughters
Noisy or secret
O Mystery of the deep waters
of the original Matrix
Rich roots, green tops
Tree of Life, shadows and lights
Who descends under Earth
Under the roots, under the stones
Crossing the Seven Gates of Hell
Dying and reborn
Lover of all, wife of no
Freedom of love for everyone
Beauty that heals hearts
Prostitute to the sacred gift
In this place be venerated
In this place be thanked
I beg you, Ishtar
With all the beating of my heart
So….I’ve signed up for this Tantra course, so that I can teach tantra.
Funny thing is, I’ve been teaching sacred sexuality/tantra for many years.
I was all gung-ho about this Tantra course, paid for it, and since being out of work you’d think I would have concentrated on it. But, I haven’t. Granted, I’ve been busy with BTL and Space stuff….and binge watching Super Natural. I need to get this course completed so that I can start scheduling Tantra courses.
Is this my new path? I’m not sure. I’d love for it to be. Have dreamt of it. But, I’m betting I’ll have to wait til after retirement before I can be a full-time teacher of Tantra and Reiki.
I wonder if I could take the course over a couple of days? I won’t know til I actually open it up and look at it.
I’d like to bring sacred sexuality to many, many people. I believe that can help the tone of the world.
Last Saturday, I was able to put my skill as a Qadishtu to work.
I was at a kink party and someone I’ve worked with before needed a session of sacred touch. She’s been going through a rough patch and really needed some help. I’m glad we were able to make it work out.
Since I wasn’t staying at the host hotel, it makes it harder to get everything in at an event, that i want to do. So, I only had the daytime available. We tried the day dungeon, but it was packed. We thought about driving to their hotel and using their bed, but I was resisting leaving the hotel. Her husband thought about going out in the hotel courtyard. Luckily it’s a hotel takeover event, so with the hotel wrapped around a courtyard, nudity is allowed outside.
So, we took her aftercare blanket and found an empty spot outside. She stripped down to her underwear and so did I. Then, her husband laid out her blanket for us. I had her breathe and then settle down on the blanket on the grass. I used my Reiki symbols to create a safe space for us and to get the energy flowing. It felt amazing to be doing this outside in the sun and the breeze.
I was able to balance her chakras, channel some Reiki and give sacred touch.
It was pretty spectacular.
So, after writing yesterday’s blog and sleeping on it and then while finishing listening to a book this morning ‘American Gods’ and starting to listen to a Wiccan book….I figured out why it is that I’m wanting to move forward on my path of sacred sexuality – it’s because it’s through sacred sexuality is how I connect with the Divine.
The Divine is within as well as without. It’s easier to connect with the Divine that is outside of us. We can see it in the cycle of birth and death. We can see it in miracles. We can see it in things of beauty that we can’t explain, in the birth of a child, in the gaze of creatures, in the growth of plants. But, we also have Divine within us and the easiest way for me to tap into that is through sexual energy.
Sexual energy is one of the most powerful energies to work with. I want to further my spirtual path and growth through using sexual energy. The depth of connection that is involved; the vulnerability; the compassion; the empowerment….all of that is part of my spiritual path. I need to embrace it, even if that means I travel the path alone.